Overheard Today

C, I'll always be your best friend.

Awww...

(C & G were playing.  I'm not sure what they were playing, but from the other room, G says, "C, I'll always be your best friend."  I'm hoping that this means that it is sinking in to some extent that brothers and sisters are around more than friends.  Friends come and go, but if you can get along with your family, they'll be around your whole life.  The key is to know how to get along.) 

Maybe it was sickness after all ...

G is home sick from school today. She is not running a fever, but she is so congested with a cough. She is really tired and just wants to cuddle. C is a snot monster. For the last 2 days, when I get up from sleeping, I have a little dizzy spell. I'm also dizzy when I lay down. I think I have fluid in my ears. I've been popping the vitamin C because you know how I hate antibiotics. Why is it so difficult to teach kids not to cough all over me (or anyone else for that matter.)?

Anxiety and the Lord

I have been so tired lately and I've had a migraine almost everyday. I just want to bury my head under the covers and sleep. I feel like I'm coming down with something, but I never actually come down with anything. I've been this way for over a week. So I've been trying to take care of myself, getting adequate rest, not too little or too much, exercising, and eating well.

I started to realize a couple of days ago that my fatigue and my migraines are probably just physical manifestations of the stress and anxiety I'm feeling over the uncertainty of the future. Will we stay or will we go? If we stay, does that mean that nothing will change? If we go, where are we going? How will we get everything done?

We've been going to church on Saturday nights, and I really didn't want to go to church last night. I didn't want to smile and make small talk with my friends. I didn't want to get everyone ready to go out of the house. I just wanted to take a nap. Well, when I woke up from my nap at just the right time to church and I couldn't seem to keep my eyes closed, I got ready for church. We were actually 10 minutes early to church. That really never happens to us.

Well the message was about Philippians 4:1-9. The pastor basically used the scripture to give a formula about what to do when you have anxiety. I found this interesting because in my talks with the Lord, I often ask how to not be so anxious. Here is the to do list for how to not be anxious:

1) Hold on to the truth.
2) Unite with others. (Stay connected.)
3) Rejoice - make a choice.
4) Pray - talk, surrender your concerns, & have gratitude
5) Think - good thoughts
6) Live accordingly

I find this interesting because even if you subtract the Lord out of this equation (although I don't recommend it) this list really includes a lot of what modern psychology recommends through therapy. How long ago was Philippians written?

The Lord is so good. BTW, after the message, the band played my favorite song, and it was one that they don't regularly play. I've been hoping they would play it again so I could see the title and look it up on itunes.

I'm still tired and I actually have a sore throat this morning, but I also have hope and that makes all the difference.

Valentine's Memories & C's Questions

I've spent today planning for C's Birthday & Valentine's Day. It has brought back memories of Valentine's Day while I was growing up. My mom would put little heart shaped chocolate crispies in our lunches, and my dad would bring home flowers. He would give a single blossom, usually a carnation to D & I, and he would give several flowers to my mom. Depending on how much money we had at the time, she might get roses or just 6 carnations. She would always put them in a vase in the kitchen window. I just thought it was so cool that he brought D & I flowers, and that he gave more to our mom. It felt like everything was in its place. I don't remember if he kept doing this after B & S were born. Y'all will have to chime in with what you remember.

C's Question of the Day:
Why do you pick up a spider with a tissue? (I haven't seen a spider in weeks so I have no idea where this came from.)

That one is always thinking.

G was at home today because it was Election Day, and they use the schools in MD for the polls. We were working on her homework, and C comes running down the stairs. He tells me that he has something to show me so I go up the stairs. For Christmas, I bought him a hot wheels car organizer that hangs over his door. It is covered with car-sized plastic pockets. Well, he had collected enough cars to fill the bottom row. He was so proud of himself that he was just beaming. So of course, I gave him a huge hug. His birthday will be Cars themed, but he is also very much into space. My parents and siblings gave him his birthday presents this past weekend. So for the last 2 days, he has been playing with Planet Heroes and asking space questions. Although, my brother did give him Cars (from the movie), and this is what he was lining up on his door. I will be giving him Cars bed linens as well as a rug for his bedroom floor that has roads on it so he can drive his cars all over town. He picked everything out on a trip to Wal-Mart. He also has requested Grilled Cheese Sandwiches and Broccoli for his birthday dinner with Cars cupcakes for dessert. He has become quite opinionated since Christmas when I couldn't get him to say anything about what he might want for Christmas. It is amazing what a couple of months does.

Mad about Jane Austen

PBS has had the Complete Works of Jane Austen on Masterpiece. Each Sunday it is a new piece. So far I've watched Persuasion, Northanger Abbey, and Mansfield Park. Last Sunday, they did Miss Austen Regrets which was a movie about the last few years of her life. It is so interesting to see how timeless these stories can be. I'm just fascinated by how some things have changed for women, but other things have stayed the same.

I also just finished a historical novel about Emily Dickinson. Emily was basically a recluse who was fortunate to have family wealth. She devoted her life to her poetry, and at times she was just a little crazy. Her family basically allowed her to be a recluse so that she wouldn't embarrass them in public. Emily lived through the Civil War, but it didn't touch her life very much. She made a conscious decision to only have relationships with men via correspondence so that she could devote her time to her poetry.

I am a strong believer in the value of women, but I don't buy this feminist notion that we can have it all. Whatever road you take, there will be benefits, risks, and a price. I am glad that we live in an age where women can make more choices about what to do with their lives, but those choices are often a painful selection process. There just isn't enough time in the day to be all things to all people and still carve out a niche for yourself.

Health Update: I've lost the 5 pounds I gained over the holidays plus a couple more. I quit going to Body Pump, but I'm doing more yoga, and I'm working on increasing my cardio from 20-30 minutes to 30 minutes - 1 hour. As usual, consistency is the most difficult. There just isn't a good time of day, but I'm making some progress.

I really like Mansfield Park because the heroine of the book/movie is poor, plain and not very clever, but it is her gentle and quiet spirit that makes her so endearing. I like to find those hidden qualities.