Yakkity Yak Yak

I was without a voice for several days, and now that I have some of it back, I just want to talk, talk, talk. I guess that is only natural, but I've gotten a few strange looks from acquaintances who aren't used to me talking so much. Not having a voice is very isolating. Ah well ... Eventually things are getting back to normal. Maybe there is even hope that my house will get clean.

We have finally gotten a camera, and I have several pictures I want to take and post, but the weather isn't cooperating. It has been so overcast that there is just a couple of hours a day that have decent light or the slim possibility of taking a decent picture.

What is going on with everyone? Is everyone ready for the holidays? I need to make sure that I have equal gifts for the kids. I hope to wrap some things this weekend. Also, I have some cookies to bake, and menus to plan. Of course, all I want to do is knit my next sweater. (Did I tell you that I finished my cabled cardigan, and I think it turned out great. Hopefully, N can help me take a great picture of it.)

101 Things

I would like to encourage all of you to take the time for the 101 Things in a 1001 Days. It has really helped me to change the way I spend my time so that it matches my priorities. Of course, my house isn't as clean, but I'm feeling a lot less frustrated. I'm making time for playing games and reading books to the kids as well as exercise and creative endeavors. It's like these things finally made it on my to do list. In fact, I think the 101 Things is like taking your goals and putting them in a to do list form. It has been great motivation for me.

How our thoughts shape our lives

Do you ever feel like a certain topic keeps coming up in completely unrelated circumstances? Well, lately, I've read unrelated books and had several conversations with people who don't know each other about how our thoughts shape our lives. I feel like I'm being surrounded. So I'm taking the hint and really delving deep into the topic to see what I need to hear. Actually thought control is a large part of how I overcome anxiety. The interesting thing is that in order to have control of my thoughts, I didn't focus on getting the negative thoughts out; I focus on putting positive thoughts in. Since N & I have been under a lot stress lately, I wonder how our thoughts contribute to our feeling stress. Here is how I start the process of controlling my thoughts:

1) When I'm feeling calm and the kids are occupied, I think of some simple sentences that I know are true and good and healthy. Sometimes these are from the Bible, like "I have a sound mind." Sometimes these are things that I need to hear, like "I have plenty of time, or I am a good mom."

2) Whenever I'm feeling frazzled or anxious, I start repeating these sayings over and over in my mind. I repeat them slowly and purposefully.

3) If I notice that in a certain situation, I'm more frazzled than others or I'm repeating thoughts in my head that are causing harm, then I try to come up with sentences that are made for that situation. Sometimes we say things to ourselves that we would never tell someone else, like "I am so fat." If you wouldn't tell others, then don't tell yourself that either. Be as courteous to yourself as you are to others. Instead of trying to stop saying "I am so fat," when you catch yourself saying that, then repeat to yourself, "I am becoming healthier and healthier."

Recently I've been so frustrated with the kids and I have caught myself thinking "No one listens to me." This of course is a gross overstatement, but if I tell myself this enough times, then I will believe it, and it will shape my attitude. I found myself becoming more angry and less patient with the kids. I've started to say to myself that "The kids will learn how to listen to me." "I can figure out how to teach them to listen."

Over time, when you fill your head with healthy words, then these words will heal your attitude and make you feel so much better about your life. They can even help motivate you to try new things and gain new confidence.

That being said there are times when your brain chemistry can be off, and it becomes close to impossible to shape your thoughts. The negative overcomes the positive. If this is the case, and you, for whatever reason, can't go see a psychiatrist or counselor (which I strongly recommend), then I suggest you try taking Fish Oil capsules. Most Americans are extremely nutritionally deficient in Omega 3s and there has been a link between lack of Omega 3s and the increasing incidence of Depression and Bipolar Disorder. For more information about all of the scientific studies, please read The Omega 3 Connection by Dr. Andrew Stoll.

Hope this helps everyone.

Thanksgiving Menu

Reisling
White Merlot
Iced Tea
Cranberry OJ Punch
Hummus with Veggies
Glazed Pecans
Smoked Turkey
Dressing (Barb's Recipe with Kimberly Modifications)
Cranberry Relish (I thought fresh cranberries came in 16 oz bags, but all I could find here is 12 oz.)
Mashed Potatoes & Gravy
Broccoli with Garlic and Soy Sauce
Green Beans with Shallots
French Whole Wheat Dinner Rolls (Pillsbury)
Dutch Apple Pie (Barb's Recipe with store bought pie crust -- *gasp*)
Blackberry Crisp (From Nigella Lawson)
Pumpkin Pie (My Mom's)
Vanilla Ice Cream and/or Cool Whip

What are y'all having?

P.S. - I dyed my hair Intense Ginger Red this morning ... still can't find the camera

Oh the funny things that C says ...

This weekend we had a visit from Aunt M who is just showing (read: pregnant). M was showing us her ultrasound pictures, and explaining to C that they were pictures of the baby in her tummy. C's first response was: "The baby doesn't look much like you." This was quickly followed by "How did you eat that baby?"

This morning I was strongly encouraging C to get dressed. He comes up to me in his birthday suit with his blanket wrapped around him and says, "These are the clothes that I'm wearing today." So of course I laughed, and then told him "Go put your pants on!" I have been keeping the house fairly cool, and I was amazed at how long he could stay in nothing before he actually wanted to put clothes on. I guess the boy has a few of my genes in spite of the fact that he looks just like his dad.

101 Things to Do in 1001 Days

I've been thinking a lot about goals and plans. Then, I saw this on the CassKnits! blog, and I thought it was such a great idea.

The original idea is from this website.

The Mission:
Complete 101 preset tasks in a period of 1001 days.

The Criteria:
Tasks must be specific (ie. no ambiguity in the wording) with a result that is either measurable or clearly defined. Tasks must also be realistic and stretching (ie. represent some amount of work on my part).

Why 1001 Days?
Many people have created lists in the past - frequently simple goals such as New Year's resolutions. The key to beating procrastination is to set a deadline that is realistic. 1001 Days (about 2.75 years) is a better period of time than a year, because it allows you several seasons to complete the tasks, which is better for organizing and timing some tasks such as overseas trips or outdoor activities.

Some common goal setting tips:
1. Be decisive. Know exactly what you want, why you want it, and how you plan to achieve it.
2. Stay Focussed. Any goal requires sustained focus from beginning to end. Constantly evaluate your progress.
3. Welcome Failure. Frequently, very little is learned from a venture that did not experience failure in some form. Failure presents the opportunity to learn and makes the success more worthy.
4. Write down your goals. It clarifies your thinking and reinforces your commitment.
5. Keep your goals in sight. Review them frequently, and ensure that they are always at the forefront of your thinking.

So here goes ...
Start Date: November 5, 2007
End Date: August 1, 2010
Updated: June 19, 2008 (228 Days)
Sick Days:12

1.Drink 8 glasses of water a day. (206/228=90%).
2.Eat 2 fruits & 3 vegetables everyday. (189/228=83%).
3.Be in bed by 10:30pm 850 times (85%=goal) (117/228=51%).
4.Perform 30 minutes of Cardio Exercise 600 times (60%=goal) (145/228=64%).
5.Perform Core Strengthening Exercises 450 times (45%= goal) (33/228=14%).
6.Perform Lower Body Strengthening Exercises 150 times(15%=goal) (18/228=8%).
7.Perform Upper Body Strengthening Exercises 150 times (15%=goal)(19/228=8%).
8.Visit the dentist 4 times (0/4).
9.Visit the eye doctor 2 times (0/2).
10.Visit the gynecologist 2 times (1/2).
11.Lose 5 pounds. Completed 5/2008.
12.Lose 10 pounds. Completed 6/2008.
13.Lose 15 pounds.
14.Lose 20 pounds.
15.Lose 25 pounds.
16.Keep weight off for 1 year.
17.Take a Yoga Class. Completed 4/2008.
18.Take a Spinning Class. Completed 12/2007.

19.Pray everyday-giving my cares over to God (211/228=93%).
20.Read Bible everyday (156/228=68%).
21.Remember one moment each day that makes me smile and thankful (210/228=92%).
22.Attend a church meeting once a week (14%= goal) (24/228=11%).
23.Memorize 50 scriptures (3/50).
24.Perform 10 acts of kindness (3/10).
25.Participate in 3 in-depth Bible Studies (1/3). IP
26.Give Fast Food Bucks to a homeless person.
27.Finish The Purpose Driven Life. IP
28.Finish Knit Together. Completed 1/2008.

29.Be encouraging – Say encouraging things to family and friends everyday (204/228=89%).
30.Sit down at a table and eat dinner with my kids 800 times (80%=goal) (190/228=83%)
31.Eat home-cooked dinner 6 days a week (86%=goal) (172/228=75%).
32.Read 800 books to my kids (80%=goal) (89/228=39%).
33.Have homework time with kids every school night.(79)
34.Play 143 games with my kids (14%=goal) (31/228=14%).
35.Go out with DH (no kids) 33 times (8/33).
36.Take 3 trips without the hubby and kids (2/3).
37.Learn how to dance with DH.
38.Make a decision about having another child.
39.Go on a week long vacation for our family (DH & the kids).
40.Read Raising Great Kids.

41.Make 33 items for charity (9/33).
42.Reduce my yarn stash and organize it within current containers. IP.
43.Buy new yarn only for gifts, to complete a project or out of weekly cash. IP
44.Finish the 2 sweaters I have in progress (2/2). Completed 4/2008.
45.Make 3 cardigans (1/3). IP
46.Teach 2 knitting classes (1/2). IP
47.Take a class on finishing garments.
48.Knit Baby Blanket for Nephew. Completed. 12/2007.
49.Knit Monkey. IP
50.Knit Jaywalkers.
51.Knit Pullover Sweater.
52.Crochet Handbag.
53.Make 5 Dishcloths. (1/5) IP
54.Knit or Crochet a Rug.
55.Find a knitting circle of friends. Completed 12/2007

56.Blog regularly (60%=goal) (51/228=22%).
57.Go to several craft shows and research what knitted objects are being sold and what booths look like. (2)
58.Make some items specifically to be sold. Completed. 01/2008.
59.Develop a business plan.
60.Sell something on the Internet.
61.Earn some income from business.

62.Follow Flylady. IP
63.Clean out and organize storage areas. IP
64.Organize my bedroom closet and get rid of anything we don't use. Completed 5/2008.
65.Get rid o vacuum cleaner, computer & grill. IP
66.Clean out and organize office & files. Set up a command center. IP
67.Organize the hall linen closet. Completed 02/2008.
68.Organize the kitchen & get rid of anything we don't use. Completed 06/2008.
69.Organize the toys & develop a system to keep them organized. Completed 05/2008.
70.Landscape front yard. Completed 05/2008.
71.Grow a simple herb garden. IP
72.Go green on cleaning supplies. IP
73.Set up Recycle Center. IP

74.Document each thing completed. (9/101) IP
75.Try 33 new restaurants (16/33).
76.Read 33 fiction books (26/33).
77.Read 33 Nonfiction books (8/33).
78.Read 10 best sellers (3/10).
79.Learn about 10 new things (4/10).
80.Buy a digital camera or find the old one. Completed 12/2007.
81.Take pictures every week of my kids once I get the camera. IP
82.Put pictures in photo albums.
83.Make a photo wall of meaningful photos.
84.Finish State Quarter Books. IP
85.Finish my Soduku Book. IP
86.Go camping.
87.Visit an art museum. Completed 05/2008.
88.Consolidate and alphabetize addresses into one location.
89.Host a board game night.
90.Plan next 101 things to do.

91.Streamline monthly finance upkeep. IP
92.Move AEP 401 K to Fidelity.
93.Learn about retirement investing
94.Understand where we stand for our retirement.
95.Keep to monthly budget.

96.Brush and floss teeth morning & night (180/228=79%).
97.Wash face morning & night (177/228=78%).
98.Get dressed 6 days a week (86%=goal)(177/228=78%).
99.Paint my finger nails 15 times (4/15).
100.Paint my toenails 33 times (12/33).
101.Paint DD's nails 33 times (4/33).

Anyone want to join me ...

Happy Halloween

G will be Snow White & C will be Spiderman. I helped in G's class for her Fall Festival. I am in awe of her teacher. She is simply amazing with the kids. While I enjoyed myself for an hour, I don't think it will be a career choice for me at any point in time. I am just hoping that N will be home in time to take the kids trick or treating. Usually I hand out candy and he takes the kids trick or treating, but every year I wonder if he will make it home from work.

Neither N or I celebrated Halloween as kids, and I don't think it was out of any feelings of deprivation that convinced us to make changes for our families. On the other hand, we observed that this was one of the few times of the year that neighbors actually had community, and I always felt that not celebrating Halloween was completely misunderstood by others. In fact, I was more likely to be thought of as a member of a cult than as a Christian. So we decided that we would put an emphasis on celebrating community and having fun, and we would not celebrate fear or scare.

Pumpkin Carving

We carved two pumpkins last night. One had the bat signal on it and the other was a ballerina. I am still missing my camera, so there will be no pictures. I am praying that I will find it. So far, I have looked through all the toy bins, under beds, couches, and cushions. I have looked through every bag and coat. I can't think of anywhere else. I have even offered rewards and treats to the kids if they could find it. Last year, we lost our camera at a Fall Festival, and then bought a new one. This year, I put it down next to the couch, and it disappeared. I'm not sure we have the money to buy a new one. (BTW, I am still missing a bread knife that disappeared months ago.)

Today is G's picture day at school. She looked very cute in a pink and navy dress (of course).

After school, we will be picking up G's glasses. The frames on her glasses wouldn't hold the lenses, and finally the store agreed to replace the frames and lenses for no charge. We pick up the new glasses today. I hope that these will be better than her old ones. G has been without glasses for a week, and her school picture won't have the glasses in them, ah well.

It is finally been Fall here the last few days. I might actually have to turn on the heat. The trees are looking really pretty.

Needlework Doldrums

I have 5 projects in progress, and I have 2 projects that I want to start. When I get to this point, I need to finish something before I start something else. I can't really explain this need, but it is like I have too many open ends. That seems strange, but I just need to finish something & in this case, I need the needles from one of my unfinished projects in order to start the other project. I don't even know if I am making any sense. This is a really great 1st post. I'll just go back to my socks now.

New Craft Project for Kids Rooms

I just finished decorating the kids rooms with this project. All I did was buy a yard of fabric at Walmart. Then Suzanne and I cut out the characters. I dipped it in fabric starch and stuck it to the wall.

What do you think?

Sabbath Simplicity

After several of my friends recommended this book to me, I finally took the hint and started reading it yesterday. The book is called Breathe by Keri Wyatt Kent. She talks about Sabbath Simplicity, and reading the book is like breathing fresh air. I have read less than 50 pages, and it makes me want to put aside my to do list, all my worries, and just sit at the feet of Jesus.

The book is centered on the following scripture in Matthew 11:28-30:

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."

The yoke mentioned in the verses historically meant a rabbi's interpretation of how to apply God's law, or how to live it out. She quotes Rob Bell, who I know some you know and love, and those of you who don't know Rob Bell, you can find his podcasts at Mars Hill Community Church. He really has a way of explaining things that I never could quite get. In this verse, Jesus is saying that his way of life is easy.

Sabbath Simplicity is a God-focused life rhythm of work and rest. It means to live your life the way that Jesus would, and not in some kind of cheesy WWJD (What would Jesus do?) way. Connecting with God begins with changing our focus and our pace. The first step is to slow down your life's pace so that you can be fully present, mindful, intentional, creating space & to notice where God is working and to join Him in that work.

Even if you don't believe in God or follow Jesus, I think we all miss something in life when we live with our focus on either the past or the future. Slowing down and being present would make this a much better world in our everyday workaday lives. The goal of life is NOT to do as much as I can as fast as I can. Sometimes I just need to hear that over and over, and take the time to appreciate my blessings and what is going right in the world. I know that there is a lot going wrong in the world, but not EVERYTHING is going wrong. While I don't want to live with my head in the sand, I do want to take the time to enjoy what I do have: my family, especially my husband, and my children.

Yippee!!!

G and I got our hair done yesterday. G has a cute chin-length bob. My hair is a shag and I'm trying to grow it into a long shag.

Oh, and I've been invited to the beach for a week. So the kids and I will be having a great time. Poor N has to work. :-(

Hair, Hormones & other Girl Stuff

G wants us to have the same hair color, and I'm actually thinking about it. Every time I let my roots show, I have more and more gray hair. I am graying really fast, and I'm scared to let my hair grow all the way out now because I think that I'm at least 25% gray and I'm only 35. I was reading something the other day that has pretty much convinced me that I am in peri-menopause or at least the stage right before menopause. All my symptoms point to my progesterone is decreasing. Oh the joy of being a girl.

Actually, I just screamed ...

... at C "Boy, get out of the kitchen or I'll hurt you!" Of course this was provoked. I swept and mopped the kitchen floor, and then half an hour later, C pulled a baggie of cinnamon sugar off the counter and sprinkled it all over the floor. I was right there watching him with mouth hanging open. I got up, figuring it was my fault for not putting the baggie away when I was finished using it, and swept the floor. While I was sweeping, C pulled a spice bottle out the pantry, which was open because I had just pulled the broom out of it, and opened the bottle and started pouring it out. That's when I grabbed the bottle and pointed to the basement stairs while screaming .... I try very hard not to scream at the kids, but I honestly think that that would have tempted the most patient souls, and God knows I am not the most patient of souls.

Just another boring blog entry (he he)

I don't have anything to say that would generate lots of debate and comments. I don't really think about politics most of the time. What do I think about? Knitting, knitting, with a little crochet thrown in. I am not sure if this makes me really cool or a geek, and I don't think that I care because I really found something that gets my creative juices flowing.

I have been working on knitting 2 socks at one time on 2 circular needles. It is working out well, except that since I only had one ball of yarn, I had to work from the inside and the outside ends. This means that the yarn keeps getting twisted on itself. Once I finish, I am going to start knitting a pair of black cotton blend socks. I got the yarn in Texas, and I think I am going to try a little cable or lace pattern. To date all of the socks I've made have been simple ribs.

I am still working on the cabled cardigan. I have half a sleeve and the collar to finish. It has been difficult to work on because it is a heavy winter cardigan, and it is Spring. ah well...

I am also taking a class on designing and making a sweater from the top down. This is really exciting because I'm learning all about using stitch patterns in design and shaping.

I signed up for a crochet bag for June. It is really cute, and there is a picture of it on this website:

http://www.interweavecrochet.com/

I really like to have 3-4 projects going on at a time, so that if I get stuck on something, then I can work on something else until I can figure out my problem or get help as the case may be. On the other hand, if I start more projects, then I start getting this feeling like I must finish something. Knitting just seems to make me more zen.

Phony Sheep :-)

Isn't this cool? I found this picture through a knitting forum.

Weight Milestone

I weighed myself this morning and I am now back below my prepregnancy weight with C. My belt is on its last notch so I may have to buy new pants if I loose anymore weight, which I will!!

I have been in research mode, and I read something last week about how anti-depressants can effect your weight. They either slow down your metabolism or they make you feel hungrier. I must say that I am learning to feel a little bit hungry. In fact, I don't remember feeling hunger like I do now with the exception of breastfeeding C. I felt like I was tired and starving all the time when C was breastfeeding. It felt like he drained me dry. In other ways, he can still do that now, although he is just the cutest, most cuddliest little boy who is the first to ask me if I feel okay. I have been so impressed with how compassionate both G and C can be. I guess there is something to be learned from a mom who doesn't feel well from time to time.

My next milestone is my prepregnancy weight with G; that's another 7 pounds.

Wooly Bullies

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JZcUjYpjKZs

This mockumentary is in the same taste as the movie about the dog shows. I think that this runs right up the H sense of humor, so let me know if I am way off.

Can't Wait For SPRING!!!

I just needed a bouquet of tulips so after MOPS had this floral design class, I went out and bought 2 bunches of tulips and this round bowl. I think it turned out rather well, and I am enjoying my lovely tulips.

Just for Fun ... Drum roll please ....

Ta Da

Here is the knitting project I've been working on. What do you think?

New York Romance

For those of you who needed another picture of N and me, here is a picture of us in the back of a carriage while we were riding around Central Park.

Caden's Gansey

Here's the sweater I knit in my knitting class. See the Needlework album for the upclose pictures of the upper chest, and his initials at the bottom.

Beginning of KJ's Scarf

Here's the scarf I've started for KJ.

Knitting Update

I finished NJ's scarf last night, and I've started KJ's. I am getting less done than usual because I've been taking a knitting class (Christmas gift from N !!!) to make C a gansey (fisherman sweater). All I have left is the neck so I was able to get some work done on my other projects. I have so many projects floating around in my head right now that I am really excited to knit, knit, knit.

Thoughts, Feelings, Actions

Thought-wise I'm having a bad day. My thoughts whirl around my head, and I try to chase them down, make them stay in line and behave. It's a lot like chasing C, my external whirling dervish. Anyway ....

I am thinking that I need to construct some kind of vision statement. Spend some time putting my thoughts down on paper. Kind of organizing my thoughts so that I can quit struggling and find alignment. Develop a structure so I can see how my life today fits into the whole of my life. I am tired of surviving the day. I want to thrive and really appreciate all my blessings, instead of dwelling on my failings.

So I ask you ... do you have goals or a vision for your life? What kind of actions/steps are you working on to meet your vision? How do you maintain your focus when a bad day or a rotten circumstance cloud your thoughts and feelings? Am I just crazy? Perhaps I should just let go in the whirling thoughts that swirl and swirl around my brain?

Just one of the lessons I've learned from G

On the train coming home from NYC, I realized how friendly I found most of the people in NY (although we didn't have to drive anywhere. Typically, I find people in Baltimore friendly until I get behind the wheel of a car. Back to the topic ...) The people were friendly because I was friendly and I talked to them like they were people. G is really the one responsible for teaching this to me. Ever since G was born, she has liked to be talked to. In fact when she was newborn, the only I could get her to stop crying was to talk to her. She is a chatterbox, and really always has been, but she really likes to be talked to and she likes explanations even if she can't always understand. It was hard for me to learn to keep up the running commentary when she was a baby. Now it is easier because she just keeps asking me questions. I think that G feels the most loved when I talk to her, share things with her and so forth. I am learning that others like to be talked to as well. Out and about in NY, N and I found many friendly people and we wouldn't have known that they were friendly if we didn't talk to them, usually we talked to them first. Of course, part of talking to people is listening to them when it is their turn to talk.

Now I just need to continue to talk to G and help her to understand that sometimes Mom needs a break from the talking and the listening.

NYC was GREAT!!!

N and I had a great time. We loved the train ride and all of the walking. Our hotel room was upgrated for free, and it was really quite lovely. We had the absolute best gyro that I've had in years from a street vendor at the corner of 55th and 6th. We had a lovely horse carriage ride around Central Park. We visited St. Patrick's Cathedral and it was so beautiful and just filled with peace. The quiet spirit of the place felt tangible and real. We saw the beginning of a wedding while we were there. The bride, bridesmaids and flower girl were stunning. Unfortunately, I messed up with the charging of the camera battery so we bought a disposable camera and it will be awhile before we get pictures.

Gotta go fix lunch.

Happy 3rd Birthday C!!!

Yesterday we had C's birthday party at Pump It Up Party. Everyone had a great time. I will be posting some pictures in an album in a minute.

Magic Thinking Take 2

I don't think I communicated what I intended.

G does ask questions about magic, but I am more concerned about my own desire to have things instantly. I understand that G is just imagining and experimenting. I think it is great that she uses her imagination and I think this will only help her problem solving skills in the future.

I am more concerned about the adults who seem to have Magic Thinking. Instead of using our imaginations to help fuel problem solving. We just get bogged down in the "Why isn't this happening faster?" Well, things that take work and time end up being more meaningful than things that happen instantly. Life becomes more meaningful when we are able to slow down and add purpose. Weight loss lasts longer when it slowly comes off. Handmade heirlooms take time to create. Gourmet meals are slowly simmered and they are made to be savored.

I want to teach G to think outside of the box and encourage her creativity, but I also want to teach her the value of working on a project over time. Of course, the latter lesson might just happen over time

The Law of Attraction

This is a universal law that basically means "like attracts like." In the Bible, it is phrased as you reap what you sow. I have heard versions of this my whole life, but lately, I have heard and been thinking a lot about it.

Oprah had a show yesterday called "The Secret," and her guests talked in great detail about how the law of attraction works. Of course, they are trying to sell The Secret book and DVD. However, the show did give me a lot to chew on.

What you focus on is what you attract into your life. When your thoughts, feelings and actions are in line, then you can attract anything into your life. This works postively and negatively.

For example, if you focus on how you have been hurt by a man in your past, then you will either keep attracting the same kind of man into your life or you will not attract any men into your life because you are already focused on the hurt.

For me this manifests itself with weight and health issues more than anything. I tend to focus on how I'm not measuring up and year after year, I don't meet my goals of getting fit and trim. This year I've been telling myself that THIS IS THE YEAR. This is the year that I am going to figure out how my body works to get it into the healthiest shape. I have stopped focusing on the weight I have to lose and started to focus on how many steps I can get in today. As I have increased my steps, I have focused on my progress, how well I'm sleeping, and how my energy is improving. I have worked on my attitude and being grateful for all of my many blessings. It is amazing how less stressed I feel when I focus on what I am doing. Instead of focusing on the things I am not doing, I just tell myself that I have plenty of time to get to it, and I will get to it in time.

They talked about forgiveness in the Oprah show as well. Forgiveness was defined as when you become grateful for the bad thing that happened to you. This was particularly hard for me to swallow. Although I guess I do usually eventually come to a conclusion that I learned something from the bad experience, even if the only thing I learned was that I could get through the experience.

This is a long post, and I needed to get some of these thought out that have been floating around in my head. Please let me know what you think.

Here is the post to Oprah's show on The Secret.

http://www2.oprah.com/spiritself/slide/20070208/ss_20070208_284_101.jhtml

Magic Thinking

It seems like lately that I have had many conversations with G about magic. I think she is watching too many Disney movies. I think that our world happens so fast ... fast food, TiVo, microwaves, iPods that we have come to expect everything to happen instantly. Our expectations have changed to the point that our patience dwindles due to what I call magic thinking. Magic thinking is when you mentally wave your magic wand and expect things to happen: the meal to be on the table, the house to be clean, the book to be read, the movie to be on. G has asked me why I can't just say the magic word and do .... or have ... appear.

Quite honestly, we should expect things to take WORK. Worthwhile things happen with work or action NOT MAGIC. The law of attraction only happens with thoughts, feelings and actions in alignment. If one of these is not in alignment, then positive changes don't happen. The law of attraction is not about how to Think thinks into existence or as some Christians have put into play the "Name it, Claim it" theory. God doesn't work that way and Nature doesn't work that way. I hope I can teach G that true wonder comes from action not from magic. People, places and things are transformed by actions. This is wonderful and awe-inspiring. Of course, I also believe that prayer is an action. Gratitude is an action. Forgiveness is an action. Am I just talking in circles?

Bad Hair

OKAY You asked for it. Here is a picture of my bad haircut. Please keep in mind, that this is after it has grown out for 6 weeks and I got another haircut to even it out because it was razored unevenly.

Congratulations to Beth

My sister, Beth, is now officially a RN!!!!

Way to go!!!

How do I explain ....

that some names are not acceptable? My sister, Beth, gave the kids these long horn stuffed animals. They are so cute, and the kids have to know where they are at all times. C calls his "Big Horn" or "Long Horn", but G wants to call hers .... HORNY. She explained this to me while we were waiting for C to get out of school, in front of about 10 other Moms who were trying very hard not to burst out laughing. I calmly said that "Cutie" was a much better name. "Cutie" is what she was calling it the day before. Anyway, G did drop it for a while, but she tried to argue with me on 2 other occasions that it should be called HORNY. I finally had to say, "Enough already; the absolute final answer was that NO she couldn't call the cow HORNY. " OH, what to do ... what to do ...

C is so excited about his birthday, and I found the perfect place for him. I have rented "Pump It Up", and I invited his preschool class and some friends that I've made at MOPS. Pump It Up is a place filled with giant inflatables, and you only pay for the kids, even though adults can play on the inflatables too. They have slides, bouncers and climbers. I am going to attempt a "Thomas the Train" cake that I saw on a kids tv channel, called Sprouts. You make a track out of cookies and crumbs, and the train is made out of cake baked in mini loaf pans. The face of Thomas is a vanilla wafer. It looks cute and fairly easy. The only catch is that 2 of the kids coming are allergic to peanuts and tree nuts so I have to make sure that all of the cake, candy and cookies that I use are allergy free. C has been getting really excited about the Cars characters and dinosaurs although he still loves Thomas the train, and there is lots and lots of Thomas the train stuff that he doesn't have. He has plenty of clothes, but he goes through about 3 pairs of pants a day because he is really interested in water here lately. I can't seem to keep it out of it. He is still in 3T pants. The 4Ts are just too big around the waist and too long. He can't seem to where his pajamas either without getting them completely soaked or smelly, but he does where 4T in the pjs.

About my hair, I went to this place that I had been before. She does do a good job on my hair. She evened it out, and it is growing out nicely, but it is still too short for me. It doesn't really look short because I have this thin layer of shoulder length hair. Its my layers on top that are really short. Anyway this place is kind of on the expensive side and they are always trying to sell me all of their services and products. It is a full service salon with all kinds of services. I get kinda tired of the sell thing. I just want to relax and enjoy my time. I might keep trying other places until I find someone who is more reasonable in price and won't butcher my hair. I much prefer having to go back because they didn't cut enough.

I have been recovering (catching up on the housework) from being away at my mom's, and last night G started vomiting. She hasn't vomited at all day today, but she is really grumpy and lethargic so I don't think she is quite herself yet. She doesn't really have a fever either. Anyway she hasn't been warm enough for me to take it.

Dehydrated

So far all of my bloodwork has come back as normal. I've upped my water intake from 8 cups to 12 cups (8 oz per cup). I feel a lot better. I think that with the additional exercise that I've been getting and the decongestants I've been taking for my allergies that I just needed more liquids.

HELP!!! I'm Stuck

I think the picture tells it all.

Note: It took G and I a full 10 minutes to remove C from the back of the chair.

From the Annals of C (or the Trials of K)

I wish I had better news to report, but C has continued his rampage. It started yesterday morning with a broken toilet tank cover. I ran upstairs to use the bathroom and left my two children happily eating breakfast. As I was coming down the stairs, I hear "Mom, I break it. Mom, I break it." I go into the bathroom to find that the cover has a huge chip out of it. C never could tell me how exactly it happened. I guess the moral of the story is that I just can't go to the bathroom.

I'm pretty sure something else happened yesterday, but I 'm just too tired to remember it. I guess it wasn't unusual enough to stick in my brain. This morning C woke up with swollen eye lids and green gunk in his eye. That didn't slow him down and DING, DING, DING ... C got into the bathroom soap pump. I wish I could just put door safety latches on all the bathrooms, but then G couldn't get in to use them. That could be an even worse disaster. I don't know ... at this point that could be a close call.

I took C to the doctor, and he does have pink eye so I can't send him to school tomorrow. N had to move a meeting because I have a doctor's checkup tomorrow and I begged him not to make me take the kids. I have had a few days of light-headedness and I can't seem to get rid of a sore throat. I suspect I could be anemic and maybe have strep throat, but I'll see what the doctor says. Sometimes my anxiety makes me believe things are worse than they actually are. Sorry this post isn't all that hilarious. I think I'm just tired but hey I've earned it.

P.S. I'm half way through JH's wrap. I'm trying to finish a few things, but I start a knitting class on Saturday. I'm so excited. It's going to be so great.

What in the world has C gotten into today?

C, my sweet, sweet son, decided to empty a tube of Boudreaux's Butt Creme.

Have you got the picture in your mind yet? Let me help ...

He found it in the bottom of his drawer when he was supposed to be taking a nap. Anyway, he washed his window with it and then coated his trains and track. (His room doesn't smell like poop anymore.)

To his credit, he did get out a bunch of wipes (a whole package) and try to clean everything up (wipes everywhere). (I found all of this ...)When I went upstairs to put him to bed, he cheerfully showed me the empty tube because I thought he had gotten into the yogurt again. He didn't want me to ban him from yogurt so he showed me the empty tube of diaper ointment. G and C helped me clean everything up with such a good attitude -- they were getting to stay out of bed for a few more minutes. I did draw the line when C wanted to eat some raisins that had been on the ointment covered train table. He just doesn't understand why a little diaper creme would prevent him from eating his favorite raisins. (What I want to know is how a kid can eat diaper creme covered raisins but refuses to eat vegetable soup? Could the vegetable soup really be that bad?)

G wanted to know if she ever got into things the way C does. I don't think anyone gets into things the way C does.

Oh shoot, I should have taken some pictures. I have many, many pictures showing what in the world C has gotten into. I am glad that I can still find the humor in it. One especially memorable time was when he climbed into the fireplace full of ashes although it was G who took a marker and wrote all over the back of his brand new shirt while I went to the bathroom. And I thought it was a good thing when my kids finally let me go to the bathroom by myself.

Just another evening in the H's House

Well, I've been working on the computer trying to balance the Christmas bills. N had to go into work today because this is crunch time at work, and I will need to go see my mom at the end of January by myself.

G is running around crying: it's a cry that alternates between "I can't find the remote. The world is coming to a horrible end because the remote is missing." and "Oh my God, I'm going to throw up because C has pooped in his diaper again. Please Mom change him IMMEDIATELY."

For a few seconds there was a small silence, like the eye of a bad storm, and then came:
"uh ... uh... uh... MOM, C IS CUTTING YOUR YARN!!!"

Personally, I think the world froze as I ran to the couch to see C with a little pair of scissors cutting a string of yarn that was attached to something I was knitting. At that moment, I could definitely understand child abuse. I had to hold myself back from picking him up and shaking him violently. I know the yarn isn't worth him having brain damage, but for a minute there it was a close call. Anyway, I discovered that the damage is repairable and we have all calmed down. C has survived the day with only the typical bumps and bruises.

Knitting Frenzy

Okay, I have been in a knitting frenzy. I have 3 projects on needles and I have at least 3 more that I want to start. Must knit ... must keep on knitting ... I am so excited. I wish I had the words to tell you how I feel. I am creating. I am expressing... This is probably keeping me sane.

Anyway, this picture is the back of a cable cardigan that I am making from the most wonderful wool alpaca yarn. The color is a beautiful rust.

NJ's Scarf ... the beginning

I've started NJ's scarf. It is made up of a stitch called Seed Stitch Blocks. I'm not sure if you can see the pattern clearly, but I think it is going to turn out nice.

JH's Wrap

This is J's wrap for her black dress with green polka dots that I promised to make about a year ago. Anyway, I am really happy with the stitch that I finally settled on. It is called Granite Relief Stitch. I found this stitch and the one for NJ's scarf on LionBrandYarn. com if you want to see a more clearer picture.

Calorimetry

http://www.knitty.com/ISSUEwinter06/PATTcalorimetry.html

I found this on a knitting blog, and I just thought it was the coolest thing. So for those of you with long, thick hair, would you wear this?

Bamboo Scarf

A while ago, I finished M's scarf, but I just got around to taking pictures. The pattern is called Bamboo. I have been working on a cable cardigan, and I started working on JH's black wrap and NJ's scarf. When I get enough done, I will post a picture in progress so they can comment.

Quiet

I haven't been posting much lately. N says that I've been pretty quiet at home. I am not sure exactly why. Just thinking ... I guess.

I just finished reading the last in the Mitford Series by Jan Karon. The series about an Episcopal priest in a small North Carolina mountain town. Over the course of the series, he gets married for the first time after he turned 60. He adopts a young boy. Of course, there are many more things that happen to him, but the books are just about life and people. They are so calm and peaceful, even in the midst of disease and tragedy. The series takes place over 10 years and Father Tim develops diabetes and continues to struggle with it over the series. One of the books is Father Tim experiences a major depression. That book was especially poignant to me. Anyway, in this last book, I just adored how Father Tim and his wife, Cynthia, talked to each other. They were encouraging and supportive. I hope my words become that healing. They take in more than one "stray." Sometimes, the strays are animals and sometimes they are people. I understand that this fiction, but I can hope that I can become that caring and hopeful in adversity.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!

Hope everyone has a great new year!!!

P.S. - I personally hope that this year brings less change and more peace. Everyone in my family has moved this year so hopefully everyone will settle in for a while.